Me.
#40
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
As I sat quietly in my car, gazing on to the field of which I was parked next to... I couldn't help but notice a few children running about, playing with one another.
It was then that I began to reminisce on my own childhood, and soon enough I developed a comparison of how I am today with how I was then.
There was an innocence in every single one of us. While I may not speak for all, I'm fairly certain that as it is now, the majority of us have lost all that innocence.
As a child, it was normal for us to take risks. We'd run here and there, do things no self-respecting person would, and put ourselves in dangerous positions - unknowingly.
As we aged, that innocence - the very thing that made us do everything we did - began to diminish. Comparatively, we no longer put ourselves in such situations. Situations where we were bound to get hurt - physically or emotionally. There's a certain level of caution around all of us, something that never was there.
Back then, we could fall off a tree and cry our hearts out for what seemed ages. But when the time came, there we were - climbing that tree again. Despite the pain and frustration with going through difficult times, we still put ourselves through it.
We'd fall, but we'd never forget to pick ourselves up and move on. That's where we developed whatever strength we have now.
I miss those times. Things weren't so complicated then. Even though at some point or another - in one way or another - we'd have the troubles of the world on our backs. But we always learned to look past the troubles and work things out. Because none of us liked the feeling of being tied down by anything.
Relationships - whether romantic or not - were so simple. As friends, we could argue with one another to the point where our feelings would be crushed, and we'd be thrown into a certain level of despair. Even so, we'd just shrug it off the next day. We'd apologize, and we'd go back to being friends like nothing ever happened.
We could say whatever we wanted to each other. At the end of the day, it'll all come back to be alright.
We can't do the same now, can we? Everyday, we spend our time with friends. And everyday, we're watching our words, our actions - we know that one wrong turn could end up in broken relations. As much as we want to, for the most part... we're all constrained from pouring our hearts and minds out to anyone, one way or another. And when we do go overboard by accident, why is it so hard for our companions to look past what we've done, and go on being our friends?
Where did we lose the ability to look past the misdeeds of a companion, and go on with our lives? Where did we lose that level of understanding?
Why did we lose it?
Life was so simple then. But most of us were in a rush to grow up, and move on to brighter paths. What none of us expected was for it to be so much harder than it was portrayed to be.
I often joke with Aliff about being a 5 or 6 year old, mentally. In some ways, yea... I am rather childish.
But the truth is that I'm far more mature than I give myself credit for. All of us are, whether we realize it or not.
I guess, maturity didn't turn out as well as I'd hoped it to be, for myself.
Would you say the same for your own?
*Seems like I'm coming up with a lot of these posts. Blame the car. I often go into deep thought when I'm driving or just sitting in it. Meh.
**I don't speak for everyone. Childhood is different for many, but I believe I touched on matters which most of us (if not all) have gone through.
Given a certain level of thought byAdam Dewind at 4:20 PM
f u!